Marriage Isn't An Excuse to Throw Away Your Dreams

Although I’ve only been married for about two years to my service member, I’m experiencing sacrifices I never imagined for myself. Ultimately when I married Andrew, I knew that as a military spouse I would make sacrifices for his career to serve our country. How honorable is it for him to devote his career to serve our country? And how could I possibly complain or feel hurt about any sacrifices I would have to make to stand beside him?

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I guess you could say I’m selfish. I worked really hard to graduate college. Throughout college, I always had a job and sometimes I had two jobs. I went to school full time and always worked at least 40 hours a week. It was my goal to graduate college debt free and with money in the bank to buy the car I really needed. After almost three years of community college and working at a service station at night and a hotel on the weekends, I finally graduated with Associates in Business Administration. With some help from my parents, I had graduated community college completely debt free. Luckily, I received some scholarships too.

After community college, I attend the University of North Carolina at Pembroke to complete my Bachelors of Interdisciplinary Studies in Public and Non-Profit Administration. I never had a “dream job” but I thought this degree was well rounded enough to help my land any job I might want. I completed my entire degree online while working full time as a contractor for the Coast Guard’s Aviation Logistic Center. I was able to pay for my college ALL on my own. After a full summer of classes, I was able to graduate in just a year and half. There is no greater feeling than walking across the stage at your college graduation knowing that you don’t owe ANYONE any money. I graduated college  completely debt free.

After working so hard throughout college to gain work experience and most importantly graduate college debt free, I only want to succeed in my career. So after our first move, I was a little upset. I truly loved my job working as a contractor for the Coast Guard’s Aviation Logistic Center. I finally had time under my belt and I knew that I would probably advance in my career.  However, I was really optimistic about moving to Houston and landing a new job. When we first moved to Houston, I applied to any government job I was qualified for but as we all know, landing a job (a good job) takes time. I had been home for about 4 weeks and the “cabin fever” was real. I decided to join a temp agency until I finally landed that government job I wanted.

In a matter of days after submitting my resume with the temp agency, I was standing in front of the Safety Director of the company I work for now. I had no idea what I was getting into but I knew it was a huge challenge. He had been out sick with cancer for months and he was so behind on… well everything. I worked my butt off trying to help him get his department organized again. After about two months, the government job I had been dying to get called me to tell me I got the job. But after sharing my news with the company I work for now, I decided to hire on full time with them. I really love my job and I only hope to achieve my career goals with them.

With that being said, it was important for me work on a project in Billings, Montana for roughly 8 weeks. However, the tables were turned for once at our house. I was going out of town to miss important events in Andrew’s life… It’s hard when Andrew isn’t there because of work but at the same time, I’m used to him missing things at home not ME missing things at home. It’s been hard working away from home but it’s only taught me that my dreams can come true despite that I’m married to a service member.

While away for work, Andrew was promoted. As he put on his new rank, I wasn’t able to be there. I’m working half way across the country trying to accomplish my own dreams… and though it may seem selfish to some, Andrew told me not to come. He told me that if I came, he would be disappointed because I would sell myself short on the project I’m working on for work. He is now standing beside me as I try to accomplish my own dreams as I did for him.

As a military spouse and just as a spouse in general, it’s important that we keep our dreams alive and that we chase them fearlessly. Our husbands are our biggest fans and they will love and support us endlessly.